The Self Nurtured TeacherTM

3 TYPES OF ACCOUNTABILITY FOR SELF CARE

woman in yellow smiling with arms raised in fists. Text says: Accountability IS self care
Embrace your role in your everyday self care

Redefining Self Care means taking a closer look at how you stay accountable for the simple daily actions in taking care of yourself. Easier said than done, right? At the heart of any situation, I see that there are 3 ways accountability shows up: Self accountability, being accountable to others, letting others hold you accountable. Here’s a closer look at each:

Self Accountability

This type of accounability means holding your own feet to the fire for what you said you would do for YOU! Many people confuse this type with making sure they do what they said they would for others (that would be accountability to others). Self accountability is when you decide you are going to do something for you and then you follow through with it. It might look like:

  • Scheduling your workouts and going, even though you don’t want to
  • Waking up at a certain time
  • Creating a work schedule with focus times and breaks and sticking to it
  • Saying no to things that don’t serve you
woman laying back with eyes closed. text says: Self accountability: when you follow through on things for YOU!
Self accountability is at the heart of TRUE self care

Accountability To Others

This type of accountability is exactly as it sounds. When you follow through on what you said you would for someone else. You can find this type of accountable actions taking place at work, on teams, with family and friends, or organizations you are part of or lead. At the foundation it simply means following through what you said you would do for someone/something else and meeting established expectations. It might look like:

  • Keeping plans with a friend
  • Completing a work project on time
  • Following the group agreements
  • Calling/emailing a client back when you say you will
woman on phone getting task done. get says accountable to others: when you follow through on things for others.
Follow through on what you say you will do and learn to have reasonable boundaries.

Accountability Partners

This type of accountability is one where you seek out someone or a group of people that will help hold your feet to the fire when it may be too difficult to do on your own. This is usually a reciprocal relationship between you and the other person or the group. This might look like:

  • Finding a friend with a common goal and asking to be partners
  • Joining a coaching group around a topic related to your goals
  • Setting up pre-discussed expectations
  • Communicating 
  • Challenging your accountability partner when necessary
  • Being open to partner or group challenging your thinking
women hands in together in a circle. text says accountability group: people that hold you accountable to your goals and actions.
Accountability groups or partners make a difference in sustaining self care habits.

It’s important to know the various ways you can stay accountable to yourself and others. Knowing however is different than actually staying accountable. Many people struggle with staying accountable to themselves. For whatever reason, following through for someone counting on you ranks higher than being able to count on yourself.

Here are some simple tips to help you stay accountable to yourself.

3 TIPS TO STAY ACCOUNTABLE

Accountability Partner

Invest in finding a partner that you can effectively communicate with about successes and growth areas without getting defensive. Your partner, or group, will be supportive, yet hold you to what you told them you wanted. Sometimes the best accountability partners or groups are people that are not the closest to you. People close in your life tend to want to keep you safe and are usually quick to let you off the hook, where as someone you respect and can be vulnerable with that is not your bestie, might be a better choice.

Share your goals

Sharing your goals with the right people can give you a great boost of confidence to take action. Sharing with your accountability partner or group is a great place to start. A word of caution: telling everyone and anyone your goal diminishes its effectiveness. When your brain hears you state your goal over and over to anyone that will listen, it begins to associate it with already begin accomplished, even though it’s not even started. Share, yes…and be selective to share only with those that truly support you in the goal. Otherwise it’s just TMI.

Start small and with something that excites you

So often when people begin something new or have a goal in mind they swing for the fences with what they think they ‘should’ be doing based on the people or society around them. The problem with that is two-fold:

  • There is no scaffolding built in from where you’re starting to where you want to go which has a high probability of collapsing quickly.
  • If you’re not excited about your goal, the chance of you taking the action to reach is low and soon the goal and idea you had fades away.

Does any of this sound familiar?

WHERE TO FIND SUPPORT FOR YOUR SELF CARE

In our fast paced life, it can be overwhelming to intentionally go at a different pace or against what ‘everybody else is doing’. Start looking for a pace that is consistent. Think about reducing the amount of hard starts and stops you have, and focus on the small things you can do over and over again. I promise, they will lead to bigger things that will be sustainable and create a much more fulfilling existence.

Check out my Self Care Society. I offer a safe place for overworked women to come together to redefine self care, hold themselves and others accountable, and build community around everyday self care using the schedule you already have. Join other women like you get the results of less stress, less guilt, feeling in control of their choices and time, and better able to be there for those they love, and more. I know you’ll love it!

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Change your everyday Self Care when you enroll in Self Care Society
To your growth,
Jill
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