3 Steps to Discover What Fuels Your Self Care

Not all self care is created equally. The daily actions that support one person may not be the greatest lever for self nurturing to someone else. In addition, some forms of self care are short lived and situational, which is similar to your vehicle consistently being low on fuel and you giving the quick $5 fills to get by.

Being able to create a sustainable fuel source as it pertains to your self care and nurturing is what gives you everyday self care. Everyday Self Care habits and practices keep your self nurturing tank consistently close to full. That’s why following these 3 Steps to discover what fuels YOUR self care is key!

STEP 1: Ask yourself questions to define YOUR self care

Before you can begin uncovering what self nurturing actions work best for you, you first want to define what self care means to you. Here are some guiding questions to get you started:

• What do you currently do to nurture your well being?
• What messages have you received (from others, media, your experiences) about self care?
• What gets in the way of your self care?
• What do you want your everyday self care to look like?

STEP 2: Understand the 6 areas of self care

We are complex beings with numerous aspects of life that create our self awareness, self management, social awareness, relationship skills, and decision making (CASEL™). Therefore, it stands to reason that our self care could also be complex, meaning it’s connected to the various components of our lives.

• PHYSICAL SELF
• SOCIAL SELF
• SPIRITUAL SELF
• YOUR SURROUNDINGS & THE ENVIRONMENT
• EMOTIONAL SELF
• PROFESSIONAL SELF

Self care can be found I each of these areas. There is 1 area that is a great starting point for each individual. Going through some questioning techniques, trial and error, and reflecting on YOUR best starting point is where you can put your focus. Trying to be self care queen in all of these areas is going to create self care burnout! Let’s face it, self care is overwhelming. I want you to begin simplifying your daily actions and learning to let go of the expectations you believe others have of you.

Once you have your starting area of self nurturing, it’s up to you to create a 1 minute action that aligned to that area and start doing it.

STEP 3: Bookend and Anchor

Once you have that 1 minute self care action, it’s time to determine the best place to implement using the schedule you already have. Think about the start and end of your day. (bookends) Does the action you chose align with your current routines? Does it support you to add in your new action after something you’re already doing?(anchor)

You can use BJ Fogg’s template for a habit recipe (from Tiny Habits) to begin taking everyday self care action. It goes like this: After I ___(current habit already doing)_______, I will __(new action you’re going to take)__.

3-Day Self Care Workshop

If all of these steps make sense, or if they don’t, it can still feel overwhelming working the steps on your own. This is way I’ve created a 3-Day Self Care Workshop that guides you through each of these steps, with 2 bonus videos to:

1. Re-Define YOUR self care according to you
2. Learn in depth about the 6 areas of self nurturing and YOUR best starting point
3. Create YOUR bookends and anchors
4. BONUS: Taking Action & Self Accountability

I’ve intentionally set this self guided workshop up with simplicity and time management in mind. Each lesson is around 15 minutes with workbook pages that you will do along with me in the videos, therefore, no extra time to set aside to complete the action steps in determining your next best steps.

THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR SELF CARE

I truly believe that knowing what works for you, and creating an on-going relationship with trusting yourself and the actions you take is the first step in having sustainable self care and nurturing. I recently was a guest on my Instagram teaching friend’s podcast The AfroEducator. Alexis Shepard and I had a meaningful conversation about what self care is, why women struggle with implementing and sustaining it, and some of the myths which includes self care is a one size fits all. Alexis also wrote some of her own thoughts that relate to our discussion on her blog post that you can read here: The AfroEducator featuring Jill Loesch

Thanks for reading this post. If you’re looking to implement everyday self care, but overwhelmed at how to go about doing it, check out how I can guide you through a simple and easy to implement self care process that won’t break the bank! Grab your seat in The 3-Day Self Care Workshop today!